Sunday, April 29, 2012

Bishop Airport Caption Contest

Vote for your favorite caption
I have been truly impressed by, not merely the quantity but, the quality of entries received. Some of you should consider a career change and send resumes to Jon Stewart and Steven Colbert to become writers. 

Now that the entries are closed, it is up to you to select the winners in The O’Zone caption contest.

Given the limitations of the blogspot polling option, I have used the following approach. All of the entries are posted below. They are keyed to a letter designation based upon the order in which they were received.

In the poll, the letter designation appears along with as many key words as space permits.

You are allowed to vote for up to three of your favorites. The poll will close Tuesday (MAY DAY) at 8 pm.

The winner(s) will receive (through cyber-space) the newly minted O’Zone Trophy. This virtual award is crafted of the finest (virtual) walnut and (virtual) sterling silver. It bears the O’ crest and is topped by the molecular model for ozone. It will be cyber-inscribed with the name (or Anon with entry time and date) and entry of the winner(s). Insofar as nothing on the internet ever really disappears, it will establish the victor's infamy for all time.

The O'Zone Trophy

Thus, without further ado, here is the compilation of entries:

A.        If Canada is good enough for Hyde and the Clemences, it’s good enough for me. (It’s amazing what government stipends can do for you.)

B.        I'm working on naming rights for Fenway Park next.

C.        And the beauty of my airport is that all of the lounges only serve Coors lite.

D.        Our security at BB Airport is first class. We employ a team concept where every passenger is evaluated by the team and then I decide based on whatever I want.

E.         Billy Bishop Airport Offering Low Evaluation Fares and Non-Stop Fights.  All Novice Teachers Proceed to Terminal-Termination Fix. Book Now!

F.         Welcome to Fantasy Island.

G.        "Sure as hell beats their first name for it: The Lazo Landing Strip. Bob and Denise, let's grab some dinner at the Hyde Hotel Lounge. Oops, I forgot--that's in Quebec".

H.        My own airport. Something else I'm not qualified to do.

I.          I taught band, bullied teachers, and all I got was this lousy airport.

J.          "The More Baggage You Have, The Better."

K.        Home of BOZO the Clown School

L.         When God was giving out brains, Bill Bishop thought he said planes, so he bought an airport.

M.        Billy Bishop Airport: Just Another Flea-Fly Hotspot!

N.        "Now let me show you the Eric Ely sewage treatment plant"!

O.        "Lazo's Bar will be opening inside the airport soon--either this year, or next year, or the year after, or the year after that..."

P.         Fly now, pay later.

Q.        This was only a start. My friends are going to put me in charge of all the airports.

R.        Those crashes? They were the pilot's fault. I wrote the evaluations to prove it.

S.         Good ol' toys for good ol' boys!

T.         This was not what I meant when I said “gimme my props”.

U.        Make sure your seatbacks and trays are in their full upright and locked positions. It’s going be a bumpy ride.

V.        Let me show you the Jovan-Lazo Memorial chapel. I get on my knees there every day seeking guidance and protection.

W.       Come Spy With Me!

X.        Billy's Flying Circus (visual entry that can be viewed HERE)

Good luck to all, and let this dubious exercise in democracy begin.


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